Mixed Emotions

What a weekend!  It was very busy, and I felt like I had something to do at every moment!  I wanted to spend some time on my blog, add some pictures, play around with the layout, etc.  There was no time for play this weekend!  So that’s all coming soon, I promise.  Here’s what I did:

Friday- Work, dinner with the hubby, Home to change clothes really quickly, 10 year high school reunion football game, back home to do JM 30DS dvd, bed

Saturday- Get a baby shower gift, go with friends to buy new running shoes (I didn’t buy new shoes, but I did buy some arch supports), go for a 3.1 mile run, head straight to baby shower, go home, rest for a few minutes, JM 30DS dvd, get ready for the dinner of the 10 year high school reunion

Sunday- spend a little bit of time with the hubs before he went to work, 5.5 mile run, run by a friends house to pick up something, home to tend to my poor beat up feet….

That’s where the bad part of my weekend kicks in.  You remember those arch supports I mentioned buying… yeah, well, they hate me!  And my feet hate them!  When I started running Saturday, they hurt, but I figured it was just my feet getting adjusted to them.  Quickly after beginning, they felt better.  Finished my run and all was good.  Then, oh holy hell!  I started walking to the car and they HURT!!!  I took them off at the car and the world was right again.  I rested for a few minutes when I got home and iced my feet, then I did my dvd with the arch supports in.  They felt great!  Okay, so it was definitely just my feet getting adjusted to them. 

Fast forward to Sunday.  Going on my longest run yet.  Yeah buddy!  I was pumped!  And nervous!  I could do this!  It’s only .5 miles more than what I’ve done several times before.  Bring it on!  Shannon’s pace is much faster than mine, but we both decided to go at a comfortable, conversational pace so we could last the whole time.  She jogged at my speed.  We chatted the whole time.  DID YOU HEAR ME??!?  I just said that I RAN 5.5 MILES AND TALKED THE WHOLE TIME!!!!  I never in my life thought I would be able to do that.  When I started running 2 years ago (I use the term running very loosely there!) I would see women jogging and talking to each other.  I would think to myself (because Lord knows, at that point I couldn’t actually SAY out loud while jogging) “Look at those bitches!  Jogging and talking!  I bet they just saw us coming and started jogging to look good in front of us!  They’re going to stop as soon as they get past us!”  Well, yesterday, we were those bitches!!!! J  It was AWESOME!  The run felt amazing!  I impressed myself with how far I’ve come and how I’ve conditioned my body to do what I want it to.  It’s no longer in control of me, I control it!  And that, people, is the most incredible thing ever!  Insert the first high of the day! 

(gps was off on the phone, so it was really 5.5 miles according to the trail markers)

Yep, I was on a high.  Then we get to 4.25 miles.  Cramp!  Yep, in my damn left foot!  Now, I’ve had arch issues for about a year now, and the podiatrist doesn’t really know what’s wrong.  He slapped me on a steroid to help with the swelling but doesn’t know what CAUSES the swelling.  Wonderful, right?  So we’re just treating symptoms.  Well, the swelling went down, over the year, I quit working out, so I had no more problems.  Until recently.  So, I’m jogging and I feel the cramp.  It’s not the normal pulling that I feel when it normally hurts, so I shook it off and kept going.  We finished and I felt on top of the world!  Then I had to walk to the car.  Bad news.  I couldn’t get there quick enough to get my shoe off.  It HURT BAD!!!  I stretched barefooted and left the park.  On the way home, I pulled my foot in my lap to massage it.  I can only imagine the look of horror that was on my face when I felt how swollen my foot was!  It was terrible!  The worst it’s been yet.   And insert the first low of the day.

 I got home and took a hot bath, then put ice on my foot.  Right before I got into the bathtub, I decided to weigh myself.  Guess what!!!!  Go ahead, guess!  I was 169.4!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  A new decade!   There is no longer a 7 after my 1!!!! Woo hoo!!!!  I couldn’t wait to do my dvd because all of this eating right, running and working out is WORKING!  Imagine that!  That’s what a little exercise and proper eating does for you, folks!  I was back on top of the world!  Second high of the day!

So, now I’ve just got to get my workout in.  But my foot still hurts.  Surely after some rest and ice, everything would be fine.  Everything was not fine.  It hurt to walk, period.  I’m doing the JM 31 day challenge and I HAD to get my dvd in.  So I iced it some more and watched a little tv.  I finally decided that I did not want to injure myself any worse than it already was, and as bad as I hated it (keep in mind, the other day I was looking for ANY excuse for a rest day!) I took a rest day.  I’m soooo mad!  I wanted to get every sticker on my calendar!  I wanted to complete the challenge exactly the way it was designed. And there’s my second low of the day.  But I’m not super woman.  I had to listen to my body.  And I’m getting back on it today!  My foot feels a little better.  The pain when I walk is gone, but it still hurts to put any pressure on my actual arches.  No one really seems to know what it is or what to do.  I think I may take today off from running and see how the week goes, but I’m going to finish this dvd challenge damn it!

Going through all of this made me realize that in my journey, there will be ups and downs.  I will experience this along the way, sometimes from month to month, sometimes week to week, sometimes day to day and even within the day.  There are going to be ups and downs, highs and lows, ebbs and flows.  That’s just how it is.  It’s going to come in all forms too.  What matters is that I push myself when I know that I can push through, and deal with whatever it is when I can’t.  I WILL NOT let it stop me.  I WILL NOT let it hinder me.   I WILL NOT let it discourage me.  I will move forward, because this time, my journey is for life.